It amazes me at how comforting a night time routine can be to a child.
In Paige's 6 years, her bed time routine has grown more and more elaborate. It takes a good 5-10 minutes to complete. After she has dressed for bed, brushed her teeth and taken that last drink of the night, the process begins. It starts with asking her the best thing about her day. Some nights she cannot think of one and others she has three or four "best" things. Next, I ask her about the worst thing of her day. If she has one, we discuss it. Lately, she has also taken to asking me about my best and worst things of the day. Then, I proceed to tell her: "I love you bunny, night-night, don't let the bed bugs bite (tickle). From there I get kisses, hugs, and "pets" and sometimes tickles. I then have to tell her that I will see her in the morning. Any deviation on this process leads to Paige calling me out on it, and I must start the process over again. On the few occasions that I have not been home during bed time, Paige has called me so that I can do the routine over the phone.
Braedon also has his bed time routines. With him it usually starts with Todd. They go through their thing, which sometimes includes Braedon kissing his Ronald McDonald plates. Strange, I know, but whatever gets them into bed. With me, Braedon limits himself to getting kisses and hugs and telling him good night and don't let the bed bugs bite. Paige use to have a quick and simple routine, but she has had more years to develop her whole routine.
Dylan, my one year old cutie is the easiest to contend with at night time. He has yet to develop the concept of a routine, and is happy with a simple hug and kiss before being laid down.
I am curious to see how and what the boys will want as routines as they get older. It is a nice way to end the day with your children. Even as elaborate as Paige's routine is, it gives me the opportunity to have one on one face time with her and learn about parts of her life. As the independence develops and the formal education begins, the less time you have with your kiddo; night time routines allow you to get to know about your child's life outside of the home.
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
Day Trading
Day trading is a useful tool for any mom, and it has nothing to do with Wall Street.
What I am speaking of is when you and other moms you know swap certain responsibilities . For instance, picking the kids up from school. One of the moms of Paige's fellow classmate works past dismissal time on Tuesdays, so I pick Amberlyn up with Paige and she comes over to our house to play. In exchange, Amberlyn's mom picks Paige up one day a week and lets her play over at their house for a while.
This practice is beneficial to both of us. Amberlyn's mom knows that her child is going to be picked up on the day that she can't be there on time, and she saves the cost of finding a daycare or service to pick her up once a week. The benefit to me is that once a week I don't have to hassle the baby up from his nap, and wrangle both boys into the car for a short 5-10 minute trip. This also affords me time to run an errand or two if both boys are up without having to wrangle 3 kids into and out of the car.
Day trading is also beneficial when it comes to finding a babysitter for the kids when you have an event to attend that doesn't allow for kids. It saves you the added cost of finding some teen aged kid that you hope you can trust and paying them to come to your house and talk on the phone while you are gone. You know that you can rely on your network of moms, because they know they can count on you. You have the bonus of having someone that you know and trust, and you know they have the maturity to handle any situations that might arise.
Day trading does not have to be limited to children. Within my network of trusted moms are friends that know they can call me when they need something beyond the children. For instance, the friend of mine whose mother is disabled and cannot drive. If something arises that her mother needs to get to and she can't take off work for, my friend calls me to ask if I can help her. I am happy to do so because I know that my friend is there for me in a heartbeat when I need her help.
If yet undiscovered, day trading is a valuable tool for the mother's arsenal. It is definitely worth developing a network of mothers and trusted friends that you can count on.
What I am speaking of is when you and other moms you know swap certain responsibilities . For instance, picking the kids up from school. One of the moms of Paige's fellow classmate works past dismissal time on Tuesdays, so I pick Amberlyn up with Paige and she comes over to our house to play. In exchange, Amberlyn's mom picks Paige up one day a week and lets her play over at their house for a while.
This practice is beneficial to both of us. Amberlyn's mom knows that her child is going to be picked up on the day that she can't be there on time, and she saves the cost of finding a daycare or service to pick her up once a week. The benefit to me is that once a week I don't have to hassle the baby up from his nap, and wrangle both boys into the car for a short 5-10 minute trip. This also affords me time to run an errand or two if both boys are up without having to wrangle 3 kids into and out of the car.
Day trading is also beneficial when it comes to finding a babysitter for the kids when you have an event to attend that doesn't allow for kids. It saves you the added cost of finding some teen aged kid that you hope you can trust and paying them to come to your house and talk on the phone while you are gone. You know that you can rely on your network of moms, because they know they can count on you. You have the bonus of having someone that you know and trust, and you know they have the maturity to handle any situations that might arise.
Day trading does not have to be limited to children. Within my network of trusted moms are friends that know they can call me when they need something beyond the children. For instance, the friend of mine whose mother is disabled and cannot drive. If something arises that her mother needs to get to and she can't take off work for, my friend calls me to ask if I can help her. I am happy to do so because I know that my friend is there for me in a heartbeat when I need her help.
If yet undiscovered, day trading is a valuable tool for the mother's arsenal. It is definitely worth developing a network of mothers and trusted friends that you can count on.
Monday, April 20, 2009
Nothing is Truely Your Own with Kiddos Around
One thing that I never realized before having kids was that once you do have kids around, nothing is truly your own-- ever again.
I remember when Paige started becoming mobile. I still had a select few stuffed animals around that I kept out and intermingled with the books on the book shelf. All of these had some kind of meaning: the Ty bird that I received from my husband the first Christmas we were together called KuKu, another Ty bear that was in my wedding colors and served as table decor at my wedding shower, and a few others that were not as significant. I still have the first two, but the others are somewhere buried in Paige's room. I also had a pillow that I made back in high school with embroidery drama mask on it. That too, ended up in the depts of Paige's room.
I find that as Paige gets older, she is 6 now, that most of my things that become coveted are the more "girly" things. Anytime that I apply make-up when she is around, she is right there with me the entire time begging for 'just a little bit." I have had to hide my lipstick from her so that when I need it I do not discover that it is used and messed up.
Paper products also go missing when Paige discovers them. Get a new note book or clip board to write on, you will discover her drawings filling up the pages that you thought empty. This has caused me time and grief, especially when her little friends are around to help her out.
Nothing is safe from the boys either. Forget about post it notes; Braedon scribbles on them so you can't even tell what you had written on there in the first place. Dylan, he just eats them. Yum.
Pens also go missing. All three of them love pens. Want to crochet? Well in this house that means guarding the ball of yarn from Dylan's fascination of balls. He thinks they are created for his pleasure. Crochet hooks--- watch out where you leave those! They are easily pulled out of your project, and deposited in the land of all things missing.
Lotion? Oooh, Paige wants to be girly, Breaedon likes using it too (not always for the intended purpose) and Dylan, well he just doesn't want to be left out.
Nail polish gets used for nail decor as well as paint, on occasion.
Heck even tampons are not safe from their hands. They make cook rockets, well at least the kids seem to think so.
I remember when Paige started becoming mobile. I still had a select few stuffed animals around that I kept out and intermingled with the books on the book shelf. All of these had some kind of meaning: the Ty bird that I received from my husband the first Christmas we were together called KuKu, another Ty bear that was in my wedding colors and served as table decor at my wedding shower, and a few others that were not as significant. I still have the first two, but the others are somewhere buried in Paige's room. I also had a pillow that I made back in high school with embroidery drama mask on it. That too, ended up in the depts of Paige's room.
I find that as Paige gets older, she is 6 now, that most of my things that become coveted are the more "girly" things. Anytime that I apply make-up when she is around, she is right there with me the entire time begging for 'just a little bit." I have had to hide my lipstick from her so that when I need it I do not discover that it is used and messed up.
Paper products also go missing when Paige discovers them. Get a new note book or clip board to write on, you will discover her drawings filling up the pages that you thought empty. This has caused me time and grief, especially when her little friends are around to help her out.
Nothing is safe from the boys either. Forget about post it notes; Braedon scribbles on them so you can't even tell what you had written on there in the first place. Dylan, he just eats them. Yum.
Pens also go missing. All three of them love pens. Want to crochet? Well in this house that means guarding the ball of yarn from Dylan's fascination of balls. He thinks they are created for his pleasure. Crochet hooks--- watch out where you leave those! They are easily pulled out of your project, and deposited in the land of all things missing.
Lotion? Oooh, Paige wants to be girly, Breaedon likes using it too (not always for the intended purpose) and Dylan, well he just doesn't want to be left out.
Nail polish gets used for nail decor as well as paint, on occasion.
Heck even tampons are not safe from their hands. They make cook rockets, well at least the kids seem to think so.
Saturday, April 18, 2009
Phone Interuptions
Having little ones makes it difficult when you need to conduct some sort of business over the phone. This morning, my PC took a dive. Of course anytime something like this happens is when one of the kids decides that they need something, and they need it now.
It doesn't matter if Todd, my husband is around. I think they time it out. Oh, Mommy is busy, so I should make sure that she is still aware of my existence and demand her undivided attention right now!
Having to spend nearly an hour on a tech support call does not help. Especially when the end result is that they cannot help you fix it over the phone. Nope- mail it in (yes the PC tower) and thank you for being patient. At least it is all for free since the part that is malfunctioning is under warranty. It just means dragging the kids out to FedEx it and then waiting 2 to 3 weeks to get it back.
Of course, once the phone call was finished, so were the kids. No more urgent issues that they needed resolved.
It doesn't matter if Todd, my husband is around. I think they time it out. Oh, Mommy is busy, so I should make sure that she is still aware of my existence and demand her undivided attention right now!
Having to spend nearly an hour on a tech support call does not help. Especially when the end result is that they cannot help you fix it over the phone. Nope- mail it in (yes the PC tower) and thank you for being patient. At least it is all for free since the part that is malfunctioning is under warranty. It just means dragging the kids out to FedEx it and then waiting 2 to 3 weeks to get it back.
Of course, once the phone call was finished, so were the kids. No more urgent issues that they needed resolved.
Friday, April 17, 2009
Just a little bit of Crazy
At the beginning of this week, my daughter's school sent home a flyer about the upcoming PTA meeting, which took place yesterday. The school set up for a "certified parenting coach" to give a thirty minute seminar before the beginning of the PTA meeting.
This really got me thinking about society today. Seriously, what has gone so wrong that parents today need the local elementary school or a "Nanny 911" to teach them how to parent? Times have really changed in the years since I was a child. Not that I would've been one of the difficult children- but you never heard of ADHD, and you did not inappropriately act out. If your parents dragged you to a friend's house and you were bored for hours, you never said anything to the contrary because that was disrespectful. You were thankful. McDonald's, or any food that was not prepared in your kitchen was a rare treat. And if an adult other than your parents treated you to something, you were extra thankful. And God forbid you were a brat in public (including someone else's house).
In those days, parents were not afraid to tell their children, "NO." They were also not afraid to hurt your feelings- physically or emotionally. Kids got spanked, even by the school principal. Having rights to play with your favorite things, or friends was not a guaranteed right. It was a privilege to be earned with good behavior.
Today's generation of parents, like those before them, want to give their kids the things that they did not have. There is nothing wrong with that, but today's generation of parents have forgotten to teach the responsibility, respect, and discipline of having those things. It is not the child's God given right to have and play video games, toys, cell phones or etc. Is it nice to be able to give those things to your kids, yes-- BUT what happened to making them earn those things and taking them away when they do not exhibit the responsibility of having them?
In my experiences of parenting, I have found that this common sense logic is easily demonstrated by three easy concepts: Follow through, your kids thinking your a little bit crazy, and the fear that you are crazy enough to follow through!
Follow through is important. If you throw a threat out, you must either be prepared to follow through or you kids must believe your crazy enough to follow through. Example, the whole one, two, three concept. Most parents never follow through on this, they get to 2 and 3/4, and finally to 3 and the threat of three is never followed up. I find the 1, 2, 3 effective on Braedon, but this is because he knows that when I get to 3, I'm not kidding around-- his world is going to fall apart. If I tell Paige that if x doesn't happen, then she won't get to play with whatever is coveted at the moment, I follow through when x doesn't happen. Common sense, period.
Now onto the crazy. I'm not speaking of loony bin crazy, nor am I speaking of anything that would harm your child. I'm talking about the kind of crazy that they think, oh my God, she's crazy enough to do that. I have two prime examples. First, I once told Paige that if she did not get her room cleaned then I would toss everything into a trash bag and take it away. She did not think I was crazy enough to do so, but she learned that Mommy was indeed a little bit crazy when those toys ended up in a trash bag in the garage. She then had to spend a week earning them back by showing that she was responsible enough to have the toys. The next occasion that she was dragging her feet, all I had to do was shake the trash bag out and she was working at warp speed. She learned that Mommy was crazy enough.
The second example occurred just this week. Braedon was dragging his feet about getting shoes on because he wanted the pair that wasn't complete. We were in the morning rush and I needed to get the kids into the car to take Paige to school. So I told him that that was fine, I was leaving with or without him. (Just note here that I would never leave him home by himself-- not only are there legal and safety issues, we are talking about the 3 foot half pint who easily turns a tube of lotion into a weapon of mass destruction). The key is, he thought I was crazy enough to do it (probably since there are times he gets left with Todd and he likes going anywhere). I had no more than turned off his bedroom light, walked into the hallway and grabbed my purse when Braedon appeared with the complete set of shoes on his feet and was happily ready to go.
I just don't understand why parents won't discipline their kids today. Society suffers as a whole. The public is forced to have to tolerate little snot faced brats. Also, once these brats grow up, they are shocked by the real world experience of not getting everything you want as a right. Must also be part of what's wrong with today's politicians... hmmm....
This really got me thinking about society today. Seriously, what has gone so wrong that parents today need the local elementary school or a "Nanny 911" to teach them how to parent? Times have really changed in the years since I was a child. Not that I would've been one of the difficult children- but you never heard of ADHD, and you did not inappropriately act out. If your parents dragged you to a friend's house and you were bored for hours, you never said anything to the contrary because that was disrespectful. You were thankful. McDonald's, or any food that was not prepared in your kitchen was a rare treat. And if an adult other than your parents treated you to something, you were extra thankful. And God forbid you were a brat in public (including someone else's house).
In those days, parents were not afraid to tell their children, "NO." They were also not afraid to hurt your feelings- physically or emotionally. Kids got spanked, even by the school principal. Having rights to play with your favorite things, or friends was not a guaranteed right. It was a privilege to be earned with good behavior.
Today's generation of parents, like those before them, want to give their kids the things that they did not have. There is nothing wrong with that, but today's generation of parents have forgotten to teach the responsibility, respect, and discipline of having those things. It is not the child's God given right to have and play video games, toys, cell phones or etc. Is it nice to be able to give those things to your kids, yes-- BUT what happened to making them earn those things and taking them away when they do not exhibit the responsibility of having them?
In my experiences of parenting, I have found that this common sense logic is easily demonstrated by three easy concepts: Follow through, your kids thinking your a little bit crazy, and the fear that you are crazy enough to follow through!
Follow through is important. If you throw a threat out, you must either be prepared to follow through or you kids must believe your crazy enough to follow through. Example, the whole one, two, three concept. Most parents never follow through on this, they get to 2 and 3/4, and finally to 3 and the threat of three is never followed up. I find the 1, 2, 3 effective on Braedon, but this is because he knows that when I get to 3, I'm not kidding around-- his world is going to fall apart. If I tell Paige that if x doesn't happen, then she won't get to play with whatever is coveted at the moment, I follow through when x doesn't happen. Common sense, period.
Now onto the crazy. I'm not speaking of loony bin crazy, nor am I speaking of anything that would harm your child. I'm talking about the kind of crazy that they think, oh my God, she's crazy enough to do that. I have two prime examples. First, I once told Paige that if she did not get her room cleaned then I would toss everything into a trash bag and take it away. She did not think I was crazy enough to do so, but she learned that Mommy was indeed a little bit crazy when those toys ended up in a trash bag in the garage. She then had to spend a week earning them back by showing that she was responsible enough to have the toys. The next occasion that she was dragging her feet, all I had to do was shake the trash bag out and she was working at warp speed. She learned that Mommy was crazy enough.
The second example occurred just this week. Braedon was dragging his feet about getting shoes on because he wanted the pair that wasn't complete. We were in the morning rush and I needed to get the kids into the car to take Paige to school. So I told him that that was fine, I was leaving with or without him. (Just note here that I would never leave him home by himself-- not only are there legal and safety issues, we are talking about the 3 foot half pint who easily turns a tube of lotion into a weapon of mass destruction). The key is, he thought I was crazy enough to do it (probably since there are times he gets left with Todd and he likes going anywhere). I had no more than turned off his bedroom light, walked into the hallway and grabbed my purse when Braedon appeared with the complete set of shoes on his feet and was happily ready to go.
I just don't understand why parents won't discipline their kids today. Society suffers as a whole. The public is forced to have to tolerate little snot faced brats. Also, once these brats grow up, they are shocked by the real world experience of not getting everything you want as a right. Must also be part of what's wrong with today's politicians... hmmm....
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
Pissy and Irritated
I am irritated today.
Since yesterday, the children have been in lets drive Mommy crazy mode. Up to the point that you have them brief moments of thinking- What the Hell was I thinking-- 3 kids, how am I going to do this. I guess that most parents have moments like this. It's not that you don't love your kids, and it's not that you don't want them. They are my life and I wanted them all from the get go, sometimes I just wonder how the heck I manage all of them when they are in their moods and manage to hold on to my sanity and good blood pressure.
I thought of the perfect analogy for Dylan's fits. Have you ever seen those goats that faint when they are startled. One moment they are standing and running around and then suddenly they go horizontal. That's Dylan. He gets angry and it hits him like the fear does those little goats. He is vertical and then he is horizontal in the blink of an eye. Sometimes I worry that he is going hurt himself when he does this. God forbid he is on the concrete and smacks the back of that cute blond head of his. Braedon is the best at instigating these episodes in Dylan. Nothing like a brother to piss you off, huh? Natural progression of life I suppose.
Then there is Paige. Lets cry over a pair of socks. Seriously- a pair of socks left at a friends house. What she wanted was to guilt me into driving back over there for them. Like I don't have other things to do. She fails to realize that I am way more stubborn than she, and I can usually tune out the drama. (That takes practice and constant discipline.) I sent her to her room and made her close the door so she raised her crying level to near scream to be sure that I heard her. Last night, I just didn't have the patience nor the discipline and had to pull out the time honored parental phrase-- I'll give you something to cry about. God... one of those old people sayings. Good bye youth, but that's another topic on its own.
Then there is trying to do anything that involves the sense of hearing when Braedon is around. Just try to take down information from someone on the phone, and low and behold that will be the time that he has the life or death realization that he needs pickles. Yes you read that right, pickles. And he shouts this at me the entire time that I am on the phone, even after I have told him that I heard him and then told him to shut up so that I can hear. Who knows if those emails are going to get where they need to go since I had to have them repeated so many times.
Dylan is good at that to. In trying to deal with those rat bastards at DirecTV (that will get a blog entry all on its own), Dylan proceeds to follow me around screaming the whole time. Screw it. Obviously I am a stay at home mom, why else would I be trying to take care of business when everyone else is at their places of business.
Sometimes you just got to hate the boss, even if the bitch is you-- I guess.
Since yesterday, the children have been in lets drive Mommy crazy mode. Up to the point that you have them brief moments of thinking- What the Hell was I thinking-- 3 kids, how am I going to do this. I guess that most parents have moments like this. It's not that you don't love your kids, and it's not that you don't want them. They are my life and I wanted them all from the get go, sometimes I just wonder how the heck I manage all of them when they are in their moods and manage to hold on to my sanity and good blood pressure.
I thought of the perfect analogy for Dylan's fits. Have you ever seen those goats that faint when they are startled. One moment they are standing and running around and then suddenly they go horizontal. That's Dylan. He gets angry and it hits him like the fear does those little goats. He is vertical and then he is horizontal in the blink of an eye. Sometimes I worry that he is going hurt himself when he does this. God forbid he is on the concrete and smacks the back of that cute blond head of his. Braedon is the best at instigating these episodes in Dylan. Nothing like a brother to piss you off, huh? Natural progression of life I suppose.
Then there is Paige. Lets cry over a pair of socks. Seriously- a pair of socks left at a friends house. What she wanted was to guilt me into driving back over there for them. Like I don't have other things to do. She fails to realize that I am way more stubborn than she, and I can usually tune out the drama. (That takes practice and constant discipline.) I sent her to her room and made her close the door so she raised her crying level to near scream to be sure that I heard her. Last night, I just didn't have the patience nor the discipline and had to pull out the time honored parental phrase-- I'll give you something to cry about. God... one of those old people sayings. Good bye youth, but that's another topic on its own.
Then there is trying to do anything that involves the sense of hearing when Braedon is around. Just try to take down information from someone on the phone, and low and behold that will be the time that he has the life or death realization that he needs pickles. Yes you read that right, pickles. And he shouts this at me the entire time that I am on the phone, even after I have told him that I heard him and then told him to shut up so that I can hear. Who knows if those emails are going to get where they need to go since I had to have them repeated so many times.
Dylan is good at that to. In trying to deal with those rat bastards at DirecTV (that will get a blog entry all on its own), Dylan proceeds to follow me around screaming the whole time. Screw it. Obviously I am a stay at home mom, why else would I be trying to take care of business when everyone else is at their places of business.
Sometimes you just got to hate the boss, even if the bitch is you-- I guess.
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
Constant Chatter
Teach them to talk, and they'll never shut up. Yep, that would describe my day today-- no doubt.
Ever notice how loud a small child talks? You got to wonder if they think that anyone taller than they are is deaf. I guess their logic goes something like this: it takes longer for the sound to travel to that higher distance, and it dissipates with the distance.
Today Braedon has been loud in everything-- especially the chattering. I am surprised that Dylan has managed to get any kind of nap today since most everything Brae has said has been in near scream form.
The irony is that Brae is one of those children who are sensitive to loud noises. He has just now got to the point that he doesn't go into hysterics when the vacuum is brought out, though he does run and hide in the farthest room from it. If the lawn mower is running, you can bet that he is inside. And then there are dogs. Nothing will send him into hysterics faster that a loudly barking dog. Just last night he cried when he was put down to bed because he could here a dog barking in the distance outside.
Back on topic, chatter. I think he would talk to the wall if he thought it would answer him back. God forbid you don't acknowledge that he has just spoken. He will just keep repeating it and louder and louder until you respond.
There are yes or no questions that he asks you. A game I suppose.
"Does that tickle, yes or no?" --- Whatever your response, he is bound to ask you yes or no at least 2 or 3 more times. He does vary it up with "on or off" concerning the lights.
Braedon likes to narrate. If you are doing something, anything- he will tell you what you are doing. If he is doing something, anything- he will tell you all about what he is doing. He is definitely not a child that you want to take into a public bathroom with you.
By the time the day like this is over, all I can look forward to peace and quiet and, time all to myself.
Ever notice how loud a small child talks? You got to wonder if they think that anyone taller than they are is deaf. I guess their logic goes something like this: it takes longer for the sound to travel to that higher distance, and it dissipates with the distance.
Today Braedon has been loud in everything-- especially the chattering. I am surprised that Dylan has managed to get any kind of nap today since most everything Brae has said has been in near scream form.
The irony is that Brae is one of those children who are sensitive to loud noises. He has just now got to the point that he doesn't go into hysterics when the vacuum is brought out, though he does run and hide in the farthest room from it. If the lawn mower is running, you can bet that he is inside. And then there are dogs. Nothing will send him into hysterics faster that a loudly barking dog. Just last night he cried when he was put down to bed because he could here a dog barking in the distance outside.
Back on topic, chatter. I think he would talk to the wall if he thought it would answer him back. God forbid you don't acknowledge that he has just spoken. He will just keep repeating it and louder and louder until you respond.
There are yes or no questions that he asks you. A game I suppose.
"Does that tickle, yes or no?" --- Whatever your response, he is bound to ask you yes or no at least 2 or 3 more times. He does vary it up with "on or off" concerning the lights.
Braedon likes to narrate. If you are doing something, anything- he will tell you what you are doing. If he is doing something, anything- he will tell you all about what he is doing. He is definitely not a child that you want to take into a public bathroom with you.
By the time the day like this is over, all I can look forward to peace and quiet and, time all to myself.
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